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[Explosion]











Yesterday nite, my fren came over to my place. He wanted to use my PC for his school project. He couldn't finish it on time, so had to stay at my home for a nite.











Slept early yesterday nite at 11pm. Told him to sleep early and dun use the PC too long. He just nodded...











At 1am, i was awakken by the heat surrounding my bedrm, and there stood him in front of my PC surveying net...











Oh my, was he overusing it...!











At 5am, i heard a blast as though as something had exploded... All power supplies were cut. I'm beginning to feel the heat...











Went to the hall and saw my mum dashing to the kitchen... She was worried about explosion. Heart beat will tend to drop off...












Later on, my dad woke up and help me in dealing with the short trip problem. We off all the switches in the house and try to toggle with the main switch in the house. Tried so many means, but the trip is not solved.











Then remembered about the power switch located OUTSIDE the house. Mum went to take the key that leads to the power circuit master switch hidden behind the small door.











I push the switch 'ON', and at last manage to get the power supply back.











[Dream of Death]











Yesterday nite, had a damn weird, scary and petrifying dream...











Before sleep, i had read my e-mail about "Saat-saat ditalkinkan..." which means, the times during death is coming near... All feelings and emotions that will be felt when the "angel of death" is coming for us...











It was sent to me by Dinie.












Felt quite enthusiastic about that story which is meant for us to learn and to repent...












It was about 11.30pm when reading up that e-mail.












At 12.45am, went to sleep... And there the dream came...












I dreamed about my uncle that was already wrapped with white cloth and cotton (dikapankan). He seems to be in the state of "nazak". But his eyes were wide open and his mouth seems mumbling... As seems as he was talking to the angel of death... Exactly like what was stated in the e-mail.











Woke up at about 4am. Shocked, thus read up some ayat kursi... And continued sleep.











[2nd Day of Raya...]











My second day of hari raya was dull. Too dull unlike almost ALL my frens and Winnie was so jolly celebrating Hari Raya with family and relatives. Imagine only 2 times my house was visited by relatives.











1) In the afternoon by my closest relative who is staying next block to mine.











2) In the night by my aunt with her cousins AND GRANDCHILDRENSSS... Aargh... *phobia* Hehehe...











I have a feeling that all my kuihs and drinks will actually be finished by my brothers, sister and myself. We were all like in a cinemania. Watching TV/VCD/DVD, and munching onto all type of kuihs, crackers and cakes..











We were so free at that time due to change in visiting schedule. Usually we would be visiting relatives in the first day. However, it was discussed and all relative shall meet at my Uncle's house on the second day of Raya so as to save on transport money.. Smart wasn't it..











On the second day, we went to Hougang. Took a cab there dangerously. My mum was like chanting the prayers till we reach Hougang. The yellow coloured cab was always moving in the middle of the 2 way line.. It also happen on the CTE.. Feel like scolding off that Uncle.. He also keeps giving intermittent brake and accelerator causing the cab to be moving like camel.. Irritating...











[Selamat Hari Raya To All!!!]











Saya Shireen, ingin mengucapkan semua sahabat karib, sayangs, TB boys, kakak, makcik, abang, pakcik, saudara-mara, dan terutama sekali keluarga tersayang selamat hari raya maaf zahir dan batin...












Kita sesungguhnya hanyalah insan yg dinama manusia... Kita tak lepas dari membuat kesilapan...












Kadang-kala kita tak menyedari apa yg diperlakukan, apa yg disebut/diucapkan, adakah akan menyinggung perasaan dan melukai perasaan sesama insan...












Ku pohon maaf dan restu dari semua di bulan Ramadhan yg mulia ini dan halalkan segala makan minum seandainya kita tidak bersua lagi...












Ku memaafkan sagala dosamu, dan ku jua berdoa agar tuhan memaafkan semua yg ku kenali... Amin...












Akhir kata Selamat Hari Raya dari saya...!











[Family crisis...]












Im feeling freak out now. My brot is back here in my house, staying with us, "sahur" with us, "buka" with us, watch TV with us and even sleep here as though he doesn't have a house of his own.












Im not trying to say bad things on him, but i just dun like him. He's our worst nightmare in the past and ALL of us hate him. He made our life suffered with poverty. Sorry just can't control myself.. But he really change a lot and that is sumtin that i respect.












I think my brot is facing family crisis. Blame him for starting a family whilst not being financially and mentally ready..












I just find it funny that my mum and dad seems to be paying more attention to him instead of us.. Jealous?? Nah.. I dun think so... Well maybe... Imagine them giving money expense to him instead of us while we were the one spending money on our household items while my brot just use the facility without having to spend a single cent.. Its like, his salary all goes to HIS family while living on us.. Irritating...>












[Brot's B'day....]











Its 6th Nov, my brot's birthday. Had 'special' food for breaking fast. Ordered MacDonald's 4 sets of EVM plus free 20 pcs nuggets.. Yummy...











Its making me drool thinking about MacDonald nuggets.. They have the best nuggets from the rest of the fast food restaurants..











[Life Still Have A Meaning....]











If there is a future there is time for mending - Time to see your troubles coming to an ending.












Life is never hopeless however great your sorrow - If you're looking forward to a new tomorrow.












If there is time for wishing then there is time for hoping - When through doubt and darkness you are blindly groping.












Though the heart be heavy and hurt you may be feeling - If there is time for praying there is time for healing.












So if through your window there is a new day breaking - Thank God for the promise, though mind and soul be aching,












If with harvest over there is grain enough for gleaning - There is a new tomorrow and life still has meaning.











[There's no such thing as perfect... ]












God made us in such a way that we would have something imperfectness in us humans...











I used to witness how a perfect couple could be together. The way they care and love each other. Something that i thought i might not had the chance of feeling it. A few years old castle build on high hopes were pinned down in just few days...












From there, i really learn that humans are err to mistake...












No one's perfect. Its us to learn our mistake and atone for it...












[Injured...]











Im injured! My right leg ankle had sprained and its killing me...












Can't move at ease, and had to be bedridden. Aargh...












Got 4 days MC for my sprained ankle..












Ouch..!!!











[My Dad....]












That time i still remember and i think before Hari Raya, my dad paid the bills for my brother UNWILLINGLY... All of us family members can see thru his behaviour and his glum face...












When my mum told him that the bill have to be settled today, he just said "Apa ni?! Kau nak bagi mampus aku eh!?" My mum went mute for a moment.












In the late afternoon, she saw my dad in the kitchen trying to cook sumtin. She went over and ask whether he wants sumtin to eat. She was so sad that he didn't even care to reply back...












God was i so angry hearing tis story from her... What a dad i've got!!! Since young, i've learnt how to earn my own pocket money by helping him to sell fishes from home to home, sending illegal stuffs to his frenz *quit already*, and also some other jobs.












Still have tis memory in me during Hari Raya. Many people are out shopping for their families. Baju kurung, baju jalan, kasut baru and others.












While people was already started shopping, there was i stood beside my dad, begging him for money to buy my Hari Raya accessories...












In the end, he did end up giving me money. But the amount was just enough for me buying a set of baju kurung. The rest was financially given by my big brother and my mom. With that small amount of money, he showed his glum face. But i just ignored his reaction, cos my baju kurung was main concern even though beaten up by him...












As i grew a bit older, there was a time where he still refuses to buy me a set of baju kurung, and finally when he gave me the money and shows me that glum face again, i threw it back to him and walk away... Isolated myself from him. Tears was dropping up to my mouth...











But my mom is the best!!!











She didn't bother about buying for her own wear, instead she went to Geylang with me to accompany me buying my own wear...












I LOVE YOU MOM!!!












That deed will always be bear in this complicated mind of mine...












As for my dad, for that hari raya celebration, while most family was begging for forgiveness from parents after back from prayers, there my brother and me, begging only my mom for forgiveness... Both of us didn't went to my dad for forgiveness...











My mom did ask me to beg for his forgiveness, but i didn't heed her advice. Instead, i ignored him for a week...












Was i bad!?











[Lagu ku 1]












Ok, i shall try to compose my own song today. Here it goes....











Dahulu ku sering berdoa,
ditemukan dengan seorang insan,
seumpama seorang bidadari,
yg bisa merubah diriku,
semoga aku berada,
di jalan yg benar,
setelah sekian lama,
ditemukan jua ia,
seorang insan ku anggap bidadari,
punyai ciri yg ku cari selama ini.











Setelah menambat hatinya,
tatkala terasa terasing,
terasa umpama langit dengan bumi,
perbezaan di antara kita,
amat ketara sehingga,
ku rasa kecil sekali,
ada kala ku sedih,
kerana perbezaan di antara kita.











Ku gembira impian ku,
tercapai jua,
namun ku lupa,
yg ianya juga ada impian,
yg ku takut ku tak mampu,
menjadikan impiannya,
suatu kenyataan,
ku sering takut pada suatu hari,
ianya akan menyesal,
ku tak mampu,
tak mampu...











Biarlah masa berlalu,
dan menentukan apa yg terjadi,
biarlah tuhan menentu,
jodoh diantara kita...>












[Penantian Yang Tak Bermakna]












Setelah lama ku menghilang,











Sempat ku coretkan sebuah puisi:-











Saat berkenalan,

Oh sungguh mesra nya,











Sering bertanya khabar,











Tak kira di mana jua,











Kau sering di ingatan,











Kau sering di jiwaku,











Tiada yang lain,











Yang ku pinta,











Yang ku dambakan,











Hanya ungkapan sayang,











Dari hati ke hati,












Pabila kau pergi,











Menimba pengetahuan,











Ku rasa sedih,











Takut kehilangan mu,












Hilang tempat bermain sayang,












Setahun penantian,











Bagaikan se-abad,











Ku menantikan kepulangan,











Sahabat kesayangan...












Pabila kau pulang,











Kenapa berlainan,











Seperti tidak mengenali,











Hilang kemesraan yg kita bina,

Di saat pertemuan,











Ku sungguh sedih,











Hati ku pilu dihiris bayu,











Kerna ku telah membuat,











Penantian yg tak bermakna,











Penantian yg tiada perhentian nya,











Biarlah...











Aku redha...

[AbOuT mE]    











(1) WiLd- I'm A LiTtLe BiT nAuGhTy WiTh SoMe TaToOs
On My BoDy. UsEd To Be In ThE gAnG,sIsTa2. NOW NOT ANYMORE! HAVE CHANGED bUt StILL hAvE tAtOoS oN mY BoDy.
(2) ChEeRfUL- I LoVe To sMiLe AnD LauGh A LoT aNd I LoVe
To MaKe OtHeRs HaPpY tOo.
(3) FrIeNdLy- I LiKe To MaKe FrIeNdS.
(4) FuSsY- I cAn Be VeRy FuSsY wHeN It CoMeS tO TaLkInG aBoUt
FoOd AnD CLoThInG.
(5) HaPpY-gO-LuCkY- I cAn LeAd My OwN wAy Of LiFe AnD
tHeRe'S nObOdY tHeRe To SaY "nO" tO wHeReVeR I'm GoiNg aNd WhAt I'm DoIng.
(6) RoMaNtIc- I LoVe To bE pAmPeReD aNd LoVe To PaMpEr My OwN GuY wItH LoTs Of LoVe.
(7) SeRiOuS- I cAn Be A SeRiOuS pErSoN wHeN iT cOmEs To ReLaTiOnShIp.
(Cool SeNsItIvE- I cAn EaSiLy GeT hUrT bY sOmEoNe.
(9) FuNnY- I LoVe To JoKe ArOuNd WiTh My FrIeNdS aNd KeEpS oN LaUgHiNg TiLL i CaN't.
(10) LoViNg- I LoVe SpEnDiNg My TiMe HaNg ArOuND wIf mY fReNds
WhEn I'm fRee.
(11) StUbBoRn- I AlWaYs FiGhT fOr My OwN RiGhT aNd DoEsN'T gIvEs Up EaSiLy.
(12) AnNoYiNg- I LoVe DiStUrBiNg My FrIeNdS a LoT.
(13) SeCrETiVe- I dOn'T LiKe To ShArE My SeCrEt Or PrObLeMs WiTh OtHeRs.
(14) CaRiNg- I LiKe TaKiNg CaRe Of PeOpLe ArOuNd Me.
(15) ReSpOnSiBLe- I LiKe To KeEp PrOmIsEs ThAt HaVe BeEn MaDe.
(16) OrGaNiSeD- I LiKe ThInGs To Be OrGaNiSeD aNd LiKe To KeEp ScHeDuLe aNd FoLLoW pLaNs.
(17) HaTeS- I ExTrEMeLy hAtE PeOpLe WhO lOvEs
To NaG,NaG,NaG...tHoSe WhO LiKeS tO tAlK BaD bEhInD oThErS...tHoSe WhO LiKeS aCtInG LiKe A gAnGsTeR...tHoSe WhO LOvEs To AcT aNd WaNnA bE sOmEoNe "AcTiOn"...tHoSe LaTeCoMeRs...ThOsE fReAk TrYiNg To AtTrAcT aTtEnTiOn In ThE pUbLiC...tHoSe SnAtChErS...

I aM a vErY tEmPeRAmEnTaL aNd HaPPy-Go-LuCkY tYPe oF pErSoN..i LiKe To JoKe ArOuND AnD lAuGh lIke A cRAzY gAL...
AlThOuGh i MiGhT bE fIeRcE aT tImEs, I'm ACtUaLLY A vErY nIcE pErSon If yOu HaVe KnOwN mE...

I lOvE tO gO sKool bUt hAtE tO lEaRn..Go To sKool To hAvE FuN wIf My FrEnDs And To CrEaT tRoUble To All THe tEaChErS aNd AlsO tHe PrInCiPaL...tHosE PeoPlE fRoM mY ClAsS sHoULd KnOw WaT i mEaN...











A friendLy And FuNNY GaL, ALwAys Likes To SiNG, LikES To MAke FRenz buT Not ENemies...FuN aNd oPeN,AppRoAcHablE aNd frIeNdLy,TaLkAtIvE aNd IrrItAtInG aT tImEs..i'm a 'hEpI-gO-LuCkY' GAL aNd I lIkE tO mAkE nEw FrIeNdS!!i'M kiNda oPeN-miNdeD tYpE...
aLsO vErY sPorTinG... hAhA...









BuBbLy, PeTiTe,nOnseNSe, TalKS cRaPS,fUnNY, lazy,nJoYS DisTurBiNg haJAr n SaL, lOud, CraZy, BlUr, OuTgOiNg, FuN,SwEeT,nICe,HanDwOrKiNgSpoRty, LovEs cAts(meoW-mEow), LOvES tO eAt,n SlEeP. [FlOoRbaLl JeRsEy no.5]









I like getting what I want, but don't like to make my intentions
obvious! In fact, I'm very ambitious and know exactly what I
want out of life and how to get it.

One of the things I need most in life is partnership. Being alone
for long stretches of time makes me feel edgy and unhappy. I'll rather be part of a team or in a relationship. But most of all I need to learn to be more self sufficient.

What is important to me is harmony. I'll do almost anything to avoid a fight within others and myself. I always try to see both sides of any story.

Often I can't make up my mind at all, because I have so many options that, I'm spoilt for choice! I can be irritatingly indecisive, and can take ages to make up my mind over the silliest things.

I love to enjoy the good things that life can offer me. I'll go all
out to get the best that money can buy not to be swanky or a show off but just because I appreciate it. Unfortunately, sometimes I am
supremely selfless.

I always put the needs of others before those of my own, but then
there are still people taking advantage of my good nature. Think it
is time to begin being a mite more selfish sometimes, right?

I'm usually cheerful and charming, ebullient and elegant, but one
thing guaranteed to wipe the smile off my face is "if I think
someone doesn't like me". I'll go all out to win them over. And most
of all, I need to know I'm being loved, and to be able to give love
in return. A wee dash of romance is what I like best, but firm
friendships and relationship feelings can also give me a deliciously warm glow inside.









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